Codependence tour '07
K has pledged he's in, hell-or-high-water in, for the bike trip.
I'm not sure whether it was his alarm over realizing I was going to go ahead and do it myself, or over the cost to our relationship that did it. Honestly, I was quite tempted to tell him to go take a hike on his own set of trails: not only had I reached the point of truly looking forward to undertaking this on my own, but this now ends up being just like any other planned travel with K, whereby it becomes a high drama situation just to get out the door. I'm a bit worn down by it.
But, realistically: (1) the logistics are now much easier (I don't drive, you'll recall), and (2) it is safer. And might even be more fun (maybe). And, moving into the rationalization territory: really, I'd set myself two challenges with this trip -- going the distance, and doing it alone -- and, surely, it's smarter to start with just one challenge? One which -- stop reading now, Mom -- doesn't preclude doing a solo trip at a later time?
The longer-range plan, incidentally, is for K to leave after we return, to spend a month or two elsewhere, sorting out his writing and his life. With any luck, I'll do the same, though with the added handicap of maintaining my job. We'll take what comes next when it comes, but we'd both like to handle it -- whatever "it" is -- amicably, and I think this resolution to the trip impasse will help a lot with that. Plus, after a miserable-by-virtue-of-job past weekend (and past week), I'm just psyched about the trip!
I'm not sure whether it was his alarm over realizing I was going to go ahead and do it myself, or over the cost to our relationship that did it. Honestly, I was quite tempted to tell him to go take a hike on his own set of trails: not only had I reached the point of truly looking forward to undertaking this on my own, but this now ends up being just like any other planned travel with K, whereby it becomes a high drama situation just to get out the door. I'm a bit worn down by it.
But, realistically: (1) the logistics are now much easier (I don't drive, you'll recall), and (2) it is safer. And might even be more fun (maybe). And, moving into the rationalization territory: really, I'd set myself two challenges with this trip -- going the distance, and doing it alone -- and, surely, it's smarter to start with just one challenge? One which -- stop reading now, Mom -- doesn't preclude doing a solo trip at a later time?
The longer-range plan, incidentally, is for K to leave after we return, to spend a month or two elsewhere, sorting out his writing and his life. With any luck, I'll do the same, though with the added handicap of maintaining my job. We'll take what comes next when it comes, but we'd both like to handle it -- whatever "it" is -- amicably, and I think this resolution to the trip impasse will help a lot with that. Plus, after a miserable-by-virtue-of-job past weekend (and past week), I'm just psyched about the trip!
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